How long must I sing this song?

My life has been like a globe in motion around the sun – interspersed with bright days and dark nights. The darkness often arrives unexpectedly – some winters are mild, other winters seem to last forever. It’s been happening for as long as I remember – way back into my teens for sure, maybe even before that.

It’s only recently that I have accepted that I have chronic depression. It’s not something that is one off. It has come to me frequently in the past and it will continue into my future.

But here’s the thing. I am determined to defeat it.

I understand that it is part of my life. I understand that I don’t have much control over it. I understand that it can be overwhelming. But I don’t think it likes a sustained fight.

I will seek out the positives. I will question the negatives. I will set myself actions, no matter how minor. I will keep myself focused on the recovery that will come. I will climb, and conquer, Mount Misery. If necessary, I will take medication, but not yet.

Aux armes, citoyens..

~ by amaltheus on August 18, 2009.